How to motivate your kids

How to motivate your kids - Most kids can achieve just about anything they want when they are motivated.

Some children are internally motivated. They are hardwired to try their best. The drive to succeed comes from within. Their self-esteem is dependent on being successful, so if they know they have a reasonable chance to achieve, they will generally persevere at most things they put their minds to. It's in their nature to try their best.

Self-motivated kids are easy for parents to work with. A combination of good teaching strategies, parental recognition and encouragement generally works wonders with these children. But many children are not so highly self-motivated and need more than good teaching to get them learning, particularly if they don't achieve immediate success, or if extra hard work is needed.

Feeling successful is not enough to motivate these kids to extend themselves. You need a range of strategies to motivate externally motivated kids to extend themselves. Here are some ideas:

Help make learning fun

Look for ways to make learning enjoyable for externally motivated kids so that their interest is maintained. Capture their attention through computer learning, games and fun activities. Get some game-based learning materials relevant to your child's age and interest levels. Make sure you get guidance from your child's teacher about suitability and interest level.

Set personal bests

Encourage kids to set learning goals and strive for personal bests. Boys, in particular, respond to competition. They generally love to compete with their classmates in school, but competition is not always about beating someone else. Challenge them to set personal bests in a whole range of activities. "What's the most number of spelling words you can learn in a week?" "What's your highest score in maths this term?"

Link learning to their lives

Look for as many ways as possible to link school learning to a child's personal interests. Many teenagers are motivated when a learning activity has an immediate, positive impact on their lives. For instance, budding sports stars will often devour non-fiction books about their chosen sport if they think it will contribute to their sporting development.

Rewards and incentives

A pat on the head from a mum or dad can be a huge motivator for children who strive hard for parental approval. However, some kids require something a little stronger, such as a reward to motivate them to work harder. If you use external rewards to motivate children then my advice is that they should be given in small doses so that kids don't always look for rewards to make them try their best.

Reward kids with extra privileges such as a later bedtime, extra time spent with friends or more television time, rather than tangible rewards such as extra pocket money. You need deep pockets once you go down this track. Be guided by your kids' interests when using rewards and incentives.

Encourage effort and improvement

Some kids will avoid learning tasks when they know that success isn't guaranteed or when failure is an option. Avoidance is one way that some kids protect their self-esteem. If you suspect your child fits this picture then focus your positive comments on effort, improvement, contribution and enjoyment rather than on the results of their learning. This releases the pressure to succeed and makes them less likely to avoid activities where failure is an option.

Sometimes just one factor will really help, but usually it takes a combination of many strategies to motivate children to really try. Research suggests that purpose and relevance are essential for many kids to learn. The great challenge for many parents is to keep children interested in learning until its relevance becomes apparent. ( bodyandsoul.com.au )

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Popularity of vampires spawns subculture, scholar says

Popularity of vampires spawns subculture, scholar says – They work as doctors and lawyers by day but lurk as vampires by night. While they may not wish to suck your blood, there are plenty of willing victims on tap, according to a top U.S. scholar on a subculture that emulates the undead.

Idaho State University sociologist D.J. Williams, newly hired as a consultant for a proposed television documentary about "self-identified vampires," said true modern acolytes of Dracula seek consensual blood-sharing relationships.

The popular fascination with vampires dates back to the 1897 publication of Bram Stoker's "Dracula", and later books such as Anne Rice's "The Vampire Chronicles."

But it exploded in recent years with the best-selling "Twilight" series of novels by Stephenie Meyer and movie adaptations. The seductive vampire character Edward Cullen in the movie, played by actor Robert Pattinson, became a teen idol and made vampires cool.

Demonstrator dressed in front of Frankfurt's ... - A demonstrator dressed as a vampire gestures in front of Frankfurt's stock exchange, September 15, 2010

VAMPIRE MANIA

Vampire mania has spawned an international subculture that strongly relates to traits associated with mythical vampires. They are believed to be seductive beings unafraid to explore the dark side of human nature that is usually masked for the sake of social acceptance.

"Self-identified vampires realize humans are a mix of light and dark," said Williams. "There is the socially desirable self that people show in public and then there is the shadow self that may not be as nice, not as optimistic. It varies from person to person, but generally vampires don't pretend it's not there: they acknowledge it and try to manage it."

What separates them from mere vampire wannabes -- the guy in a cape who sleeps in coffins or believes he is capable of morphing into a bat -- is an internal lack of energy that makes them seek energy from external sources such as the high that comes from the crowd at a rock concert or from the blood of a willing donor.

"They call it feeding," said Williams, who also moonlights as an FBI consultant for investigations involving violent criminals who are claiming to be vampires.

SUCKING BLOOD

Williams says self-identified vampires seek significant others with an abundance of energy willing to allow them to suck blood from a small incision made high up on the chest by a scalpel.

"Quite often, they are in a relationship with a donor, where one person has energy blockages and the partner has excess energy; it's a perfect, symbiotic relationship," he said.

The arrangement is legal because it is struck between two consenting adults and aims to have no ill effect, said Williams.

He is pioneering the study of such alternative lifestyles. It took years for the scholar in forensic social work, criminal justice and leisure sciences to gain the trust of self-identifying vampires, whom he says are widely misunderstood.

"The negative discourse out there about blood and the transmission of infectious diseases just drives them underground," said Williams, who advises vampire acquaintances to abide by safe blood-drinking practices like having donors tested for HIV and other ailments transmitted by blood.

And with American serial killers such as Jeffrey Dahmer, who killed 17 young men and boys in a frenzy of necrophilia and cannibalism between 1978 and 1991, billing himself as a vampire, what's a law-abiding vampire to do?

"The vampire community would argue that Jeffrey Dahmer and others aren't real vampires, they're murderous criminals," Williams said. "Those high-profile cases damage the image of self-identified vampires."

Vampire myths span the centuries, with some pinned to real-life figures like Vlad the Impaler, a 15th-century Romanian noble known for the fearsome punishment he inflicted on enemies.

MOST ADMIRED MONSTERS

Pointing to a UCLA study that ranked vampires as the most admired of monsters, Williams said self-identified vampires wage an uphill battle with stereotyping.

The subculture sometimes sinks its teeth into debates about proper vampire attire and etiquette, with some clans requiring black clothing and others insisting on beverages like blood.

Surveys circulating among vampires ask questions about their energy level, whether they heal quickly from wounds and whether blood bothers them.

Williams said virtually every age, race, religion and profession is represented in the subculture, which is strongest in urban areas.

"They see themselves as normal, regular people in normal regular jobs: they are teachers, lawyers, accountants, they may be parents," he said. "They have normal lives but there is this aspect to needing to take energy from time to time and in certain ways." ( Reuters )

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Saturated fat may not always be harmful

Saturated fat may not always be harmful - Eating butter, cheese and full fat milk might not be as bad for you as previously thought, scientists have found.

Whilst health advice tells us that saturated fat causes cardiovascular disease, it might not be as clear-cut as first thought.

Recent advances in the study of saturated fat have shown that the evidence between saturated fat intake and health had been oversimplified in dietary advice.

Several different studies seemed to imply that genetics, lifestyle and age could all play a part in how badly your body is affected by its saturated fat intake.

And some scientists believe that non-harmful saturated fats are 'lumped in' with others distorting health advice.

A series of research articles published in the journal Lipids provides a snapshot of recent advances in saturated fat and health research, based on science presented at the 100th American Oil Chemists' Society (AOCS) annual meeting.

Dr Bruce German, at the University of California, said: "Although diets inordinately high in fat and saturated fat are associated with increased cardiovascular disease risk in some individuals, assuming that saturated fat at any intake level is harmful is an oversimplification and not supported by scientific evidence.

"The relationship between dietary intake of fats and health is intricate, and variations in factors such as human genetics, life stage and lifestyles can lead to different responses to saturated fat intake."

Researchers found that replacing saturated fat with monounsaturated fat had an unclear effect on cardiovascular disease, while replacing saturated fat with carbohydrates was found to be ineffective and even harmful especially when refined carbohydrates such as starches or sugars were used in place of fat.

Replacing saturated fat with polyunsaturated fat did give a slight reduction in risk, but the benefit was very small.

Researchers concluded that rather than replacing saturated fat, we should focus more on increasing our intake of seafood containing omega-3 fatty acids, whole grains, fruits and vegetables, and decreasing our intake of salt and trans fats, found in cakes, biscuits and fast foods.

*Meanwhile a study published in the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry found organically grown onions, carrots, and potatoes are no healthier than traditionally produced vegetables, say scientists.

They do not have higher levels of beneficial antioxidants and other substances that are good for us than those grown with traditional fertilisers and pesticides, a study shows ( telegraph.co.uk )

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Preventing Heart Risks at the Root

Preventing Heart Risks at the Root - Two studies published Monday suggest that the road to hypertension and heart disease starts in childhood and that prevention should start there, too.

One analysis found that parental smoking increases the risk for high blood pressure in preschoolers, and the other that excessive sugar consumption in teenagers is associated with multiple factors known to increase the risk for cardiovascular disease. Both reports appear in the journal Circulation.

The first study looked at 4,236 children in Germany, where 5-year-olds undergo a compulsory physical and cognitive assessment before starting school. During the period of the study, 2007-8, more than 28 percent had at least one parent who smoked. Even after correcting for body mass index and parental hypertension, having a smoker as a parent substantially increased the likelihood that a child would have blood pressure readings in the top 15 percent of the sample.

Parental smoking was not the only association, or even the strongest. Being overweight and having a parent with hypertension were also associated with high blood pressure in the children. But the lead author, Dr. Giacomo D. Simonetti, said smoking was probably the easiest risk to modify.

Dr. Simonetti, a professor of pediatrics at the University of Bern in Switzerland, said there was little risk for cardiovascular disease in children. But high blood pressure persists into adulthood, and then becomes a major contributor to heart disease risk.

“If you have a kid who has high blood pressure, it’s likely he will continue to have high blood pressure,” he said. “It’s the same for B.M.I. — for an obese child, the chance of remaining obese as an adult is very high.”

The authors acknowledge that it would take a long-term study to provide proof a smoke-free childhood promotes cardiac health in adulthood. But secondhand smoke has no benefits for children and many well-known risks. There is good reason to believe that adult hypertension is one of them.

The second report was based on a nationwide sample of 2,157 adolescents surveyed by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention using a questionnaire that assessed dietary intake.

Teenagers, the researchers found, eat large quantities of sugar. In this study, the daily consumption of added sugars — that is, sugar added to foods and beverages during processing or preparation — averaged 476 calories a day per child, the equivalent of more than half a cup of table sugar. Sugar made up more than one-fifth of their total energy intake.

The researchers found that teenagers who consumed the largest amounts of sugar — more than 30 percent of their calories in that form — were significantly more likely to have lower HDL (high-density lipoproteins, or “good” cholesterol), higher LDL (low-density lipoproteins, or “bad” cholesterol) and higher triglyceride blood levels than those who ate the least, about 10 percent of their total calories.

All three of these factors are known risks for heart disease. The association held after controlling for socioeconomic factors and sex, and for the consumption of fats, carbohydrates, protein and cholesterol.

“I think that parents should be aware of how of much their teenagers’ daily energy comes from added sugars,” said the lead author of the study, Jean A. Welsh, a postdoctoral fellow at Emory University. “It’s a nutrient that provides energy but contributes very little else. Sugar-sweetened beverages are a major contributor, and there may be negative health consequences down the line.”

She cautioned that this was an observational study, and that more research, particularly in the form of prospective studies, would be needed to firmly establish the connection.

Dr. Simonetti and Dr. Welsh agreed that childhood was not too soon to be thinking about the risk for heart disease. “We always speak about prevention of cardiovascular disease in adults,” Dr. Simonetti said. “But the prevention of these diseases begins in childhood.” ( nytimes.com )

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Why do you want a child?

Why do you want a child? - To keep your mother quiet, or for your old age? Are your reasons for procreating good ones?

People have children for different reasons and I think the reason why someone chooses to have a child will affect the type of parent that he or she becomes.

Here are some of the reasons that I’ve heard parents give for having children:

‘I love children’

I think this is a noble reason for having kids. People who love kids are likely to be good parents because they’ll make all the sacrifices required to be good parents out of love.

‘The kid was an accident’

I know some parents who became parents not out of choice but because they indulged in activities that resulted in conception of the child.

Some parents are to be commended for embracing ‘forced’ parenthood and giving the child equal opportunities as any other child. Sadly not all such parents are responsible. Some are quick to avoid their responsibilities. Shame on you!

‘Mum wants a grandchild’

Not a very clever reason to have a child because mum won’t be around to care for that baby 24/7. If Mum is always about having a grandchild encourage her to put in some volunteer time at an orphanage. Hopefully that should reduce her cravings for a grandchild.

However if mum is a multimillionaire and is threatening to cut you off her will if you don’t produce a grandchild then it might be best to have one chop chop.

‘This child is my pension’

A risky pension fund! This type of parent is going to push the child to become a money making scheme, with visions of the kid looking after the parents in their old age. Disappointment usually awaits the poor parent.

‘This child will secure our relationship’

We wish this parent the best. How many divorces occur between couples with kids? Plenty. Parents planning to have a child to secure a relationship should fix the relationship first before having the baby.

Only when the relationship is strong will the baby cement relationship.

‘We want to keep the family name alive’

We hope these parents will have children who will get married and adopt their partners’ surnames. That should keep the family name alive for sure.

‘I want companionship’

True that. The parent will have non-stop companionship for at least for 18 years. Forget about heart-to-heart talk for most of that time though. Of course your ‘companions’ will leave you at some time when they have to build their own nests. ( parent24.com )

What were your reasons for wanting to have a child? And can you think of any other not-so-good ones?

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